Everything All At Once

What can I say right now other than that life is full of the possibility for adventure? I am thankful to have the privilege of calling Spain my "home" for the next year. Of course, I still miss so many people from back in the US. There is something about this life that will always define home as the place where the people we love most in this world are located, no matter where we might be.
Home... It consists of the people that have walked beside me through every joyful and sorrowful season of life. The people to whom I need not explain my entire life because they have lived it with me. The mother who has shown me what unconditional love is and the father that I respect more than any man I have ever known.
So yes, it's a bit difficult that they are all a continent away. Yet, I know that my relationship with family and friends is not dependent upon location.

The title of this post explains what moving to Madrid has been like as well as a single phrase can, I think. It's also the title of a song from Local Natives new album, so I won't claim originality. The first week here was overwhelming and challenging and fun and exciting. It was also a lot of other adjectives that I could waste your time writing out in full here, but you get the point. I was apartment hunting while also adjusting to a time difference and bizarre Spanish eating schedule that calls for lunch at 3 pm and dinner at 9 pm. I was nervous about having come and exhausted, wishing that I could call my mom to have a good cry, but it was 3 am back in Oklahoma. On day 3 of being here, I met some incredible girls who became instant friends. We all took a leap of faith and decided to live together after having known each other less than 24 hrs, and (miracle of miracles) we found an apartment by the end of week 1 in Spain. Whirlwind is a good word to describe the experience.

How rewarding that leap of faith has been. I'm living with friends that I feel like I have known for years and I cannot help but think that this year is going to be a gift. It's a joy to develop friendships with people who possess character qualities that I admire and want to reflect in my own life. It's certainly not a coincidence that I met these girls as soon as I arrived in this gigantic city. I'm thankful for the sweet ways in which I have already seen the Lord provide community here.

I don't want to paint a picture that my life is now perfect because I moved to another continent and get to have this great "experience". I want to be honest and tell you that the permanence of being away for a time is hard. Yet in saying that, I have no complaints because I am enjoying this challenge and I have no desire for living life within the bounds of my comfort zone. I don't necessarily believe that leaving mine had to look like living in Madrid, but that's exactly how it happened so I'm not complaining.

On culture:
During my time here I have noticed that Spanish people have this very intense stare. It's rather uncomfortable to be the subject of their gaze. I'm assuming that it is just a cultural thing that I'll unlikely ever become accustomed to, but it is quite common. I'm not even sure that they recognize how awkward it is because the "stare" is normal here. A few days ago, my roommates and I went grocery shopping and realized too late that all of these items we had purchased in bulk were going to have to be carried back to our flat via the metro. We couldn't stop laughing on the way home and felt like the epitome of people who "don't even go here". When we reached the apartment, our arms felt like they might fall off. To be completely honest, after that my arms were sore for about three days. I will say that the stares we received during this experience were very justified though.
Note to self: purchasing in bulk is a not the best idea here. Then again, maybe that's just any city in general when one doesn't have a car...

On life in España:
The public parks here are beautiful. It's easy to get lost in them and feel like you're escaping the noisy city while actually being in the heart of Madrid. Life here isn't so different. However, Europeans seem to wholeheartedly embrace the concept, "less is more". We have a clothes line in lieu of a dryer, I live in a room that's about the size of most American kitchen pantries back home, and our apartment doesn't have air conditioning. In fact, it's rare for homes in Spain to have AC.
I'm developing an understanding that there is quite a lot that I can live without.

I'm enjoying life here and am excited for the adventures that are to come. I'm sure I'll make many more ridiculous faux pas (like buying groceries in bulk) that might as well be a flashing sign over my head that reads, "SHE ISN'T FROM HERE!" Yet, in the midst of it all I will strive to live in the present and wish away nothing about this next year, even when it's challenging. Time is a precious thing because it's something we can't ever get back once it has been spent. Therefore, spending time wishing for things that once were or could be means missing out on the beauty of what is happening around me every day. And what a beautiful place this is for me to be.

If you have stuck with me this far, thank you for reading and know that I am probably missing you often.

Life Currently

nerves and other things

It is midmorning here and also my sister-in-law's due date for a little bundle of joy that we will call Charlotte Elizabeth. I'm writing this not feeling like I'll have very many things that are worthwhile to say. I'm wondering what I'll eat for lunch today, while simultaneously wondering if I'll become an aunt? 

I received my Visa in the mail yesterday and I suppose that is as official as things can get other than the upcoming departure itself.

I am nervous and excited all at the same time. no, it does not feel real yet that I am moving. probably won't until I am boarding the plane that will take me to Madrid... I graduated college in May and accepted a job that will take me to another continent. I am leaving comfort and security, the people I love most in this world- my sweet family and wonderful friends. 

incredibly joyful: that's how I feel. 

Joyful that I get the privilege of having this experience. Joyful that I will be able to immerse myself in another culture and way of life. Joyful that I get to walk through this scary and lonely time with the understanding that the life Christ offers me is greater than any other. I know that even though I am going halfway across the world "alone" I am not really alone at all. I'll probably cry a lot and hopefully laugh some too. Joyful that I get to see the world in this way. I can't wait to learn more about other people and myself during my time in Spain. My hope is that I will jump in fully and taste and see how good the Lord is during this season of the life that he has given me so abundantly. My hope is that I will adventure fully and love people deeply and let myself be known by others even when I'd rather put up those stupid walls- not let anyone in.

This summer, I watched so many incredible things happening around me in the lives of people I dearly love. I had the joy of watching my first best friend in college marry the man whom her soul loves. I watched my roommate travel halfway across the world to live in Mongolia for the summer. I watched my lifelong best friend move to a new city to begin her life at a new job. I watched my brother and his wife prepare for the life of their first child. Truly, I am in living in awe and wonder of this abundant life. 

I had a friend tell me this summer that when she came to know Christ, she fell to her knees and wept with joy saying, "I didn't know he loved me this much." Isn't it unbelievable? To think that he loves you and me this much. We have been given this beautiful world to explore and I cannot wait to jump in. Yet most of all, I am looking forward to the opportunity to know others more deeply. People from another continent and culture. People who don't look like me, don't speak English, don't dress like me. I am expecting to fail a lot and probably be awkward and weird. Hopefully I'll make friends that like to laugh... and cry, too.

So yes, I am giddy with excitement to begin a journey that I am sure will be fun and adventurous. But I am also joyful for the opportunity to be challenged. Joyful for the times that I will be lonely and afraid and utterly lost in a giant city where no one speaks my native language. Joyful that there will be hard times to come and joyful for all of the good times as well. Because in this, I will get to experience the reality of what it means to be found in Christ alone. In dark times and in light, he has withheld nothing about his heart from me. How wonderful it is- this beautiful life that we get to live.